I know what it feels like to lose yourself inside motherhood.
And I know what it feels like to find your way back.
My story
My daughters arrived into the world three months early.
My daughters arrived into the world three months early.
They weighed just one kilogram each.
For weeks I lived at the NICU - holding them skin to skin for hours, expressing milk through the night, doing the one thing I could do when other mothers had already taken their babies home. I was determined. I was fierce. And I was running entirely on adrenaline and willpower.
What followed was years of that same relentless drive -fighting to prove my daughters were thriving, that they were healthy and capable and fine. That I had succeeded as their mother. Health checks, medical assessments, school struggles, diagnoses. Each one a new box to tick. Each box ticked just revealing another one waiting.
Somewhere in the middle of all of it - the advocacy, the appointments, the mental load of managing three complex, wonderful lives - I lost myself completely. I burned out a business I had built from nothing. I returned to corporate work feeling like every part of the woman I used to be had been slowly eaten away. At my lowest point I was controlling food and my body because it was the only thing that felt within my power.
I was doing everything for my daughters. I had nothing left for myself.
Then, last year, a health scare with one of the girls stopped me completely. And in that stillness - alongside finding pilates, yoga, and breathwork - something shifted.
I realised I didn't need to keep proving anything. Not my daughters' success. Not my own. What my girls actually needed wasn't a high-performing mother. It was a present one. A regulated one. Someone who could be there - really there - without suffocating them or disappearing herself.
That realisation changed everything. I started dressing how I wanted to dress. Moving in ways that felt like mine. Breathing through moments that used to undo me. Advocating fiercely - for my daughters and for myself - from a place of groundedness rather than panic.
Women in my life started asking: how do you do it? How do you manage three complex, demanding, wonderful girls - with no village, no family nearby, a full time job, and still seem so together?
The honest answer is that I stopped trying to do it all perfectly and started doing it all intentionally. I regulated my nervous system so I could think clearly under pressure. I moved my body in ways that gave me energy rather than depleted it. I simplified how I feed my family so food became a source of strength rather than stress. I learned how to advocate fiercely for my daughters at school without burning myself out. And slowly, carefully, I rebuilt a sense of who I am outside of all of it.
That is The Regulated Mother Method. Not a wellness program. A whole life method - for the mother who is already doing everything, and is ready to feel like herself again while doing it.
Credentials
A little about my background.
I studied at Oxford University - a Bachelor and Master of Arts - and spent nearly twenty years working in investment banking and asset management. I know what it means to perform under pressure. I also know the particular exhaustion of a woman who is capable of everything and acknowledged for very little of it.
I am a qualified Pilates Reformer instructor and Personal Trainer, with deep practice in yoga, breathwork, and nervous system regulation. I am also an author - my writing explores many of the same themes that run through this work: identity, the mother, and what we carry quietly.
But more than any of that - I am a mother of three girls who arrived into the world too soon, who have taught me slowly and not always gently that the most important thing I can give them is not my performance. It is my presence.
